Real Life Ninja Shit

Mkay one thing y'all gon learn about me is that I keeps it funky. All the way 100% funky. So with that said, I got some shit on my mind.

After I'd been home for awhile my cousin and I decided to go on a mission. U know, a female mission. (She was looking for her man). By this time I had grown fond of herbal remedies (weed) so when we finally locate this negro first thing I said was "Smoke somethin." He took us over his guy house so we could cop. His guy came out the crib saw me in my skinny jeans and sorority jacket and that, my friends, is where the trouble began. lol.

He started shooting his shot at me. You know, saying typical ninja shit. Nothing outta the ordinary. "Damn ma u look good can I get to know u " u know, that type shit. I started to shut his ass down straight out the gate but it was something about this cat, with his dusty ass clothes, yellow ass teeth, and flip ass mouth that intrigued me. So me, figuring I had nothing to lose really, just gave the nigga my number.

We texted most of that that day and the convo was strictly sexual. My plan was to get him all hot and shit then stop his ass cold. Hey, it's fucked up but we all do it sometimes. People can provide an AMAZING source of amusement. But then he got me. I went in for the kill and he flipped it on me so serious I had to respect him for his mind power. I decided to change up the game plan and keep him around as a friend. Hell, best case scenario he'd be another weed man for the list.

Then something changed. He texted me everyday always had good conversation and was just putting his best face forward. So I started going over to see him. We'd sit in my car with a sack and a pack of 'rillo's and just smoke and talk for hours. He didn't flinch when I told him about my illness, so I, in turn, excused the fact that he was recently released from jail. (for attempted murder no less! dum dum, I know)

Physically, I wasn't attracted to him AT ALL. Hell, I'm still not. lol. But ladies u know that the more u get to know a cat the more appealing they become. So what started as a friendship escalated to a kiss, which escalated to more kisses, which escalated to my head being stuck in the back of a couch while he hit that shit doggystyle.

I ain't gon front, as lesbianic as I am I know good D when I run across it and trust me, the D was GOOOOOOOD. lol.

But then shit started changing. He started keeping more erratic hours, calling me and only wanting to fuck, or calling me and having me outside his house kicking it. Now I'm a cultured summamabitch. By that I mean that if we on this level u need to take me somewhere besides the damn hood. But he kept saying he couldn't leave the "trap" the "block". Even with all this it wasn't til he stuffed a mysterious bag down my pants while "giving me a hug" that I realized this nigga was a bonafide Snowman. Talk about reality check!

Aight, admittedly I'm kinda green so initially my realization was exciting to me. Ooooohhhh I'm fuckin a hustla type exciting. Don't front like you've never wanted to call yourself a real ride or die chick. I don't know how the hell it happened but all of a sudden I wanted to be there for this nigga. Be his rock be his baby mama all that shit.

Luckily before I could run too far with those blinders on I met another cat who opened my eyes. Just in terms of letting me know that there was actually somebody out there who could meet me on all levels. This cat didn't smoke, didn't like it when I smoked and just, in general challenged me to be better. Wasn't no slippin' or sleeping on this dude. And I liked that. Not even on no sexual shit I just enjoyed being in the company of someone who I felt was on my level.

Long story short thug nigga's time with me had been reduced severely. I never claimed him as my man nor did I ever plan to but I guess if a nigga put 2, 3 dollas in yo tank every now and then they yo man. HA.

Y'all this nigga flipped the script! Started calling my phone cussing me out all the time and when I DID see his ass (to smash of course) he started trippin' over condoms. On some "Mmmhm u fuckin somebody else." AND AT THE TIME I WASN'T!...well not any dude. lol. He knew about my relations with women and that was cool.

Major turning point came about a coupla weeks ago. He was writing on my fb wall getting all wreckless and shit texting me all crazy. But I was cool until he called me something I don't think I'll ever forget. He reached deep down in his soul and called me a "selfish, psycho bitch" Yep. At that point he couldn't even get a friendly text message outta my ass. I was done. So done. Through.

But then...lol. yeah he caught me while I was crying and upset. Said he missed me and wanted to see me. And y'all know what I said? Yep I said yes. So here I am on this nigga mission tonight with my G (hey ISIS) going to see this nigga.

Y'all.

Y'all.

Would u believe this nigga was 10 minutes late, got there, stayed for 5 minutes then said I'll be right back...and u know in my head I'm like okay this nig on bull. So I gave him 10 minutes. 10 minutes passed and he didn't come back. So I peaced out.

Which brings me to the moral of my story.

Ladies, never, EVER lower your standards or your draws for a sub-par nigga. Even if y'all are just "on some fuck shit". Cuz if u get caught up with this nigga and can't even explain to yourself why, you're screwed. And you're sitting up at 2:15 in the am like me blogging about some trife miscellaneous dick .

I hope u use me as an example of what not to do ladies, cuz trust me, my lesson is LEARNED.

peace.